Hi, it’s Greenygrey. Here’s the next beyond thrilling episode of Werewolf of Oz: Fantasy Travel by Google, which sees the denouement of the Grunginator grunge rock Terminator tale that burst into the Kerang-Kerrang time-travel town back in Chapter 82.
Grunge Rock and Trash Metal, Terminator and Blade Runner
This episode travels through a series of Mother Love Bone songs to a conclusion based on another classic 1980s sci-fi movie, Blade Runner; whereas the Terminator was all machine, Blade Runner featured android assassin replicants that were more human.
After Andrew Wood uses his grunge icon status and deductive reasoning (Marc Latham’s PhD was useful there) to reach the Grunginator; convincing it that Axl Rose shouldn’t be blamed for everything; the story ends with an Alice in Wonderland and Alice in Chains Alice mix after a pastiche of the leading Blade Runner android assassin antagonist’s final speech. Enjoy!
Chapter 90. Andrew Wood Converts Terminator to Blade Runner
Andrew Wood looked at us, and then farther down the cobbled criss-crossed streets, where the Grunginator was fast approaching. Wood motioned us behind the temple, before putting his right arm up in the air while singing to the advancing robot: ‘Stop right there Captain Hi-Top, because this has gone on long enough, you ain’t been programmed right, and you need to tighten up your screws.’
Axl Rose not to Blame for Kurt Cobain’s Death
The Grunginator stopped, and seemed to show emotion for the first time. Did a tear roll down from its lid, or was it percolator perspiration? It was hard to tell through the swirling mists enveloping the Temple of the Dog.
The Grunginator looked up at Wood, saying ‘I know you are a friend, as all the Seattle music heroes have been installed in my memory. But I know not what I do, only what Frank Grungenstein programmed in me.’
Wood looked down with sympathy, before telling it, ‘I can see your Heartshine, but they programmed you with biased and incomplete information; blaming Axl Rose for Kurt Cobain’s early death, and sending you back to the 1980s to eliminate him. Just look at me and my life; I never had no beef with Rose, but I also died tragically young.’
Terminator to Blade Runner
With that, the Grunginator seemed to calm down, and called for a time-out coffee break. It made a couple of cappuccinos for itself and Wood and they sat down on the temple steps.
It all seemed to be calming down, but then Alice in Chains fell out of the sky, singing Down In A Hole. Alice looked doomed, but the Grunginator reached out its handles and caught them.
The Grunginator looked into the eyes of Alice, before saying: ‘I’ve seen things you people wouldn’t believe: Faster Pussycat screeching on stage at the Rainbow Bar and Grill; I’ve watched Seasick Steve die in a dark shared with Love/Hate. A poison-dart-frog glowing in the Italian Job; Janis and Jimi running wild in the 1970s streets. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to fly.’
And with that it released Alice’s chains, and Alice flew over the Sea of Sorrow to Nirvana.
The Grunginator speech is a pastiche of one in the Blade Runner film. In Blade Runner, the replicant Roy Batty delivered the following soliloquy after saving the hero, who was its previous target: ‘I’ve seen things you people wouldn’t believe: Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion; I’ve watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhauser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die.’
Captain Hi-Top and Heartshine are Mother Love Bone songs.
Axl Rose is the singer in Guns N’ Roses. He and Kurt Cobain didn’t get along.
Alice in Chains and songs: Down In A Hole, Sea of Sorrow.